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Traditional goal-setting advice assumes that everything will go smoothly and is fixated on outcomes like losing weight or getting a promotion. This is all fine, except outcomes can sometimes be outside of your control. You can do everything right and still not get to what you want.

For some of you reading this, December isn't just tiring, it's genuinely difficult. If that's you, I want you to know that you're not broken. You're not a Grinch. You're not ungrateful. You're a human being having a human response to something that's genuinely hard for you. The shift that happens from knowing something doesn’t feel right to adapting to the discomfort can cross into self-abandonment.

We're adaptable creatures and we're highly skilled at working around problems. If a relationship doesn't support us, it becomes something that we manage. If a career drains us, it becomes something we endure for security and we hold hope that things will improve. The shift that happens from knowing something doesn’t feel right to adapting to the discomfort can cross into self-abandonment.

We’ve all survived uncertainty before. We’ve started new jobs without knowing if we’d be any good at them. We’ve moved house, changed relationships, faced health challenges, dealt with losses. Each time, we’ve discovered resources within ourselves we didn't know we had.

Liminal spaces can be uncomfortable. They can also be places of possibility. Transformation happens in liminal spaces and new versions of ourselves can emerge from them. Rather than viewing these in between times as problems to be solved, what if we saw them as opportunities for becoming? The liminal space you're in isn't a blip or a failing in your life. It's an integral part of your story, deserving of patience, compassion, and support.

Why change feels so hard (and what you can do about it)

In the words of the legendary Ferris Bueller: “Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it"