All that glimmers really is gold

Several years ago, after a prolonged period of stress and some major life challenges, I felt like I was in a state of freeze. I felt nothing but overwhelming anxiety, a sense of 'stuckness' and a sense that life was passing me by.

I remember being in beautiful, joyful situations and thinking “I know that this is a special moment but I’m finding it hard to feel that”. I wonder if you’ve ever felt like that? It’s a heavy, difficult place to be.

With support, I was able to move myself out of that broken-down state and one of the ways I got through it was by seeking out ‘glimmers’.

The term 'glimmer' comes from polyvagal theory, a scientific framework that explains how our nervous system has evolved to keep us alive and safe.

The concept of ‘glimmers’ is simple: glimmers are brief, beautiful moments in life where we feel connection, safety, and joy.

Glimmers are the opposite of ‘triggers’. They’re little micro-moments of happiness that make us feel hopeful, grateful and glad to be alive.

For some people, glimmers might be found in laughing with a friend, the warmth of the sun on your skin, or even the satisfaction of ticking a small task off a to-do list.

Really, a glimmer can come from anywhere. They happen to us all the time but we’re not always looking out for them. These golden moments are powerful, even those that may only last a second or two.

When we experience a glimmer, our body's natural ability to feel safe and connected is activated.

This activation can help our nervous system shift from a state of stress and overwhelm to one of calm, resourcefulness and openness. In turn, this shift can trigger feelings of joy, contentment, and resilience. Glimmers might be small but they are mighty!

So, what did I find when I went on a glimmer hunt recently? My tiny sparks of light were found in all sorts of places including:

• looking at photos that reminded me of a silly and joyful time,

• eating a really great sandwich,

• a chilly, life-affirming walk on a windy beach

And many more besides. It ended up being a pretty long list. As I noticed the pleasure that those special moments brought, I held on to that good feeling. I savoured and relished the “gold” that they filled me with.

If you’d like to look for some glimmers of your own, try:

• Paying attention to the small things: Glimmers are hiding in plain sight. Try to notice the beauty around you, even in the most ordinary moments.

• Connecting with other people: A “good morning” to a neighbour returned with a smile can spark a glimmer. Or sharing a photo or happy memory with a friend or family member can create a wealth of glimmers.

• Celebrating small wins: When you’ve achieved something, no matter how small, recognise that step taken and take a moment to feel a sense of satisfaction before you rush on to the next task.

• Spending time in nature: The natural world is full of wonder and beauty. Perhaps the smell of freshly cut grass or the swish of leaves in the trees sparks something inside you. Take a moment to notice its sweetness.

Glimmers accumulate over time. By making a conscious effort to find them, and letting them land within you when you experience them, you're building up a resource you can use when life is difficult or painful.

Glimmers are a reminder that even when things are tough, there's also sweetness, connection and safety to be found.

If you need help finding the glimmers in your life, let’s talk about it together. I warmly invite you to book a free 30-minute introductory call. You can click here to book an appointment.